Blog Archive

9 most important career planning tips


1. Never Stop Learning
Life-long learning is your keyword.

The world is constantly changing, and everybody is looking for new ways of doing business.

If you have decided that your current skills are good enough, you have also decided that your current job is good enough.

But if you want a career in the future, you should add regular updates to your skills and knowledge.


2. Ask, Listen And Learn
A good listener can learn a lot.

Listen to your co-workers, your boss, and your superiors. You can learn a lot from their experience.

Ask about issues that interest you, and listen to what they say. Let them tell you about how things work, and what you could have done better.

Most people will love to be your free tutor.


3. Fulfill Your Current Job
Your current job might be best place to start your career.

It is often very little that separates successful people from the average. But nothing comes free.

If you do your job well and fulfill your responsibilities, this is often the best way to start a new career.

Talk to your supervisor about things you can do. Suggest improvements. Offer your help when help is needed. In return ask for help to build a better career. It is often possible - right inside your own organization - especially if you have proved to be a valued employee.


4. Build Your Network
Your next career step might arise from your contact network.

Did you know that more than 50% of all jobs are obtained from contact networks?

If you have a good contact network, it is also a good place to discover future careers, to explore new trends, and to learn about new opportunities.

Spend some time building new contacts, and don
x378t forget to maintain the ones you already have.

One of the best ways to get serious information from your network is to regularly ask your contacts how they are, what they do, and what is new about their careers.


5. Identify Your Current Job
Your current job should be identified, not assumed.

Make sure you don't
work with tasks you assume are important. This is waste of time and talent.

When you start in a new job, talk to your superior about your priorities. If you
are not sure about what is most important, then ask him. And ask him again. Often you will be surprised about the differences between what you assume, and what is really important.


6. Identify Your Next Job
Your dream job must be identified.

Before you start planning your future career, be sure you have identified your dream job.

In your dream job, you will be doing all the things you enjoy, and none of the things you don
x378t enjoy. What kind of job would that be?

Do you like or dislike having responsibility for other employees. Do you like to work with technology or with people? Do you want to run your own business? Do you want to be an artist, a designer or a skilled engineer? A manager?

Before building your future career your goal must be identified.


7. Prepare Yourself
Your dream might show up tomorrow. Be prepared.

Dont wait a second. Update your CV now, and continue to update it regularly.

Tomorrow your dream job may show up right before your nose. Prepare for it with a professional CV and be ready to describe yourself as a valuable object to anyone that will try to recruit you.

If you dont know how to write a CV, or how to describe yourself, start learning it now.


8. Pick The Right Tools
Pick the tools you can handle.

You can build your future career using a lot of different tools. Studying at W3Schools is easy. Taking a full master degree is more complicated.

You can add a lot to your career by studying books and tutorials (like the one you find at W3Schools). Doing short time courses with certification tests might add valuable weight to your CV. And dont forget: Your current job is often the most valuable source of building new skills.

Dont pick a tool that is too heavy for you to handle!


9. Realize Your Dreams
Put your dreams into action.

Dont let a busy job kill your dreams. If you have higher goals, put them into action now.

If you have plans about taking more education, getting a better job, starting your own company or something else, you should not use your daily job as a "waiting station". Your daily job will get more and more busy, you will be caught up in the rat race, and you will burn up your energy.

If you have this energy, you should use it now, to realize your dreams.

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10 things to do for stress management

"The time to relax is when you don't have time for it."
Jim Goodwin

"For fast-acting relief, try slowing down."
Lily Tomlin

Stress sucks. It sucks joy and the life out of you.

So today I'll share 10 of my favourite tips that I use to minimize stress and live a more relaxed but at the same time productive life. I hope you find something helpful here, even if it's just a few reminders of things you had forgotten about.

1. Accept the situation.

Stress is often to a large part resistance to what already is. You may be in a stressful situation and think to yourself that this situation shouldn't be, that you shouldn't be here. But the situation has already arisen, is here, and so are you.
So to decrease the stress and resistance you accept the situation. With your resistance gone or lowered you can now direct your mental energy and focus to finding a solution in a level-headed manner instead of trying to do it while panicked or confused.

2. Take everything less seriously.

Taking things or yourself overly serious adds a lot of unnecessary negativity and stress to your life. A minor situation may be blown up to a major one in your mind. If you just learn to lighten up a bit, life becomes more fun and you realize that you get great results even if you aren't super-serious about everything.

3. Decrease or put a stop to negative relationships.

If someone is always making you more stressed or creates a lot of negativity in your life you may want to consider decreasing the amount of time you spend with that person. Some people almost seem to like to dwell in negativity. That is their choice. It's your choice if you want to participate.

Or you can choose to hang out more with relaxed and non-stressed people. Both in real life and by watching/listening to CDs and DVDs. Two guys that tend to calm me down when I listen/watch them are Eckhart Tolle and Wayne Dyer.

4. Just move slower.

You emotions work backwards too. If you slow down how you walk or how you move your body you can often start to feel less stressed.

This allows you to think more clearly too. A stressed mind tends to run in circles a lot of the time. And slowing down to decrease stress goes for other forms of movement too, like riding your bicycle or driving the car.

5. Exercise.

A simple and time-tested way to decrease inner tension. Regular exercise can do wonders for both your mind and body. This is one of the solutions that work most consistently for me.

6. Find five things you can be grateful for right now.

Being grateful and appreciating your life and surroundings is one of the most effective ways to turn a negative emotional state to a more positive one. So find a few things you are grateful for right now.

Perhaps it's the sunny weather, that you feel healthy and energetic today, that you have just eaten a delicious after-noon snack, that the guy/gal that just walked by had a great looking jacket on and that tonight there is a new episode of your favourite TV-show to enjoy.

7. Look for solutions.

When faced with a challenge that can cause stress, try to direct your focus to solutions rather than to dwelling on the problem for too long. Dwelling only causes more stress and makes your mind less open to finding a solution.

8. Be early.

Just be 10 or 5 minutes early for meetings etc. This very simple tip can cut down on stress quite a bit.

9. Do just one thing at a time.

Single tasking and focusing on doing just one thing at a time not only decreases stress but from my experience gets things done a whole lot quicker than if you multitask.

10. Talk to people around you about it.

Perhaps they can offer you advice that has worked for them or just an ear and some support. Just telling someone about something, just getting it out can often help to relieve some of the stress.


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Story: A Pond Full of Milk


 Once there was a king who told some of his workers to dig a pond. Once the pond was dug, the king made an announcement to his people saying that one person from each household has to bring a glass of milk during the night and pour it into the pond. So, the pond should be full of milk by the morning.

 After receiving the order, everyone went home. One man prepared to take the milk during the night. He thought that since everyone will bring milk, he could just hide a glass of water and pour inside the pond. Because it will be dark at night, no one will notice. So he quickly went and poured the water in the pond and came back.

 In the morning, the king came to visit the pond and to his surprise the pond was only filled with water! What has happened is that everyone was thinking like the other man that "I don't have to put the milk, someone else will do it."

The article can have so many differnet conclusions, here is one:

when it comes to help poor people, do not think that others will take care of it. Rather, it starts from you, if you don't do it, no one else will do it.So, change yourself to the way of God to serve Him and that will make the difference.

M Junaid Tahir

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How To Win an argument

It can be difficult for people to get their point across without hurting one another in the process. Here are some tips for effectively resolving a problem by stating your views, while being collected and reasonable. Also included are tips on winning an argument.

Stay calm & Keep a steady low tone. The energy you give off is usually picked up on by the other person; if you are calm they sense you mean no harm and relax more. Even if you get emotional, try to keep your dignity and don't lash out unexpectedly. Also consider your tone of voice; try to keep a steady, low tone and volume, not fluctuating to much in speed and sound. Try to sound as relaxed as possible and avoid high-pitched sounds. Also consider your body language: have a good firm posture that makes you feel powerful but not aggressive.

Don't insult the other person. Avoid to, in any way, say something that might be taken as an insult. When people are angry they are much more sensitive and will take even the smallest comment as an insult.

Express that you are willing to listen to the other person and respect them. Even though you might not agree with what the other person is saying you need to remember that they might feel just as strongly about their views as you do about yours.

Be reasonable. The outcome of the argument might not be exactly what you wanted, but never expect to get everything you want. Don't let it last too long, the argument degrades if it's held out. Allow each person to speak and make their point.

Set healthy boundaries. If the person with whom you are arguing is angry, obnoxious or verbally abusive, should you really be interacting with them? It may be better to walk away.

If the argument is with a clerk, salesperson, etc. ask to speak with their supervisor. If a supervisor isn't immediately available, get a phone number.

Think about the possible arguments for and against your side, and the opposite side. If there is any major weakness in your argument, you must fill it before coming to a confrontation with the opposition, or risk losing the argument.
Identify any major pitfalls your opponent can step into. A gentle nudge here and there to get them to make some sort of fallacious statement that allows you to close the bear trap is psychologically damaging and can win an argument on the spot. Also try to take each argument to its logical conclusion.
Always take full advantage of any illogicality or fallacy in your opponent's argument. Return any illogical points with as many relevant logical facts as possible, to completely quash their point. If this is not possible, take their point and use it in your favor logically.

It's always possible to lose an argument, especially if your argument has major weaknesses. Accept it if that the case. However, arguments do sometimes come to standoffs, where no side is stronger than the other and nobody wins or loses. when this happens, learn to leave the argument as nothing can be gained by continuing to confront your opponent. When this happens, don't lose control or get desperate.

source: Unknown


M Junaid Tahir

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18 ways to improve your body language

by Henrik Edberg.  

Continuing from the previous post 6 reasons to improve your body language, here is just a few of many pointers on how to improve your body language. Improving your body language can make a big difference in your people skills, attractiveness and general mood.
There is no specific advice on how to use your body language. What you do might be interpreted in several ways, depending on the setting and who you are talking to. You'll probably want to use your body language differently when talking to your boss compared to when you talk to a girl/guy you're interested in. These are some common interpretations of body language and often more effective ways to communicate with your body.
First, to change your body language you must be aware of your body language. Notice how you sit, how you stand, how you use you hands and legs, what you do while talking to someone.
You might want to practice in front of a mirror. Yeah, it might seem silly but no one is watching you. This will give you good feedback on how you look to other people and give you an opportunity to practise a bit before going out into the world.
Another tip is to close your eyes and visualize how you would stand and sit to feel confident, open and relaxed or whatever you want to communicate. See yourself move like that version of yourself. Then try it out.
You might also want observe friends, role models, movie stars or other people you think has good body language. Observe what they do and you don't. Take bits and pieces you like from different people. Try using what you can learn from them.
Some of these tips might seem like you are faking something. But fake it til you make it is a useful way to learn something new. And remember, feelings work backwards too. If you smile a bit more you will feel happier. If you sit up straight you will feel more energetic and in control. If you slow down your movements you'll feel calmer. Your feelings will actually reinforce your new behaviours and feelings of weirdness will dissipate.
In the beginning easy it's to exaggerate your body language. You might sit with your legs almost ridiculously far apart or sit up straight in a tense pose all the time. That's ok. And people aren't looking as much as you think, they are worrying about their own problems. Just play around a bit, practice and monitor yourself to find a comfortable balance.

1. Don't cross your arms or legs – You have probably already heard you shouldn't cross your arms as it might make you seem defensive or guarded. This goes for your legs too. Keep your arms and legs open.

2. Have eye contact, but don't stare – If there are several people you are talking to, give them all some eye contact to create a better connection and see if they are listening. Keeping too much eye-contact might creep people out. Giving no eye-contact might make you seem insecure. If you are not used to keeping eye-contact it might feel a little hard or scary in the beginning but keep working on it and you'll get used to it.

3. Don't be afraid to take up some space – Taking up space by for example sitting or standing with your legs apart a bit signals self-confidence and that you are comfortable in your own skin.

4. Relax your shoulders – When you feel tense it's easily winds up as tension in your shoulders. They might move up and forward a bit. Try to relax. Try to loosen up by shaking the shoulders a bit and move them back slightly.

5. Nod when they are talking – nod once in a while to signal that you are listening. But don't overdo it and peck like Woody Woodpecker.

6. Don't slouch, sit up straight – but in a relaxed way, not in a too tense manner.

7. Lean, but not too much – If you want to show that you are interested in what someone is saying, lean toward the person talking. If you want to show that you're confident in yourself and relaxed lean back a bit. But don't lean in too much or you might seem needy and desperate for some approval. Or lean back too much or you might seem arrogant and distant.

8. Smile and laugh – lighten up, don't take yourself too seriously. Relax a bit, smile and laugh when someone says something funny. People will be a lot more inclined to listen to you if you seem to be a positive person. But don't be the first to laugh at your own jokes, it makes you seem nervous and needy. Smile when you are introduced to someone but don't keep a smile plastered on your face, you'll seem insincere.

9. Don't touch your face – it might make you seem nervous and can be distracting for the listeners or the people in the conversation.

10. Keep you head up – Don't keep your eyes on the ground, it might make you seem insecure and a bit lost. Keep your head up straight and your eyes towards the horizon.

11. Slow down a bit – this goes for many things. Walking slower not only makes you seem more calm and confident, it will also make you feel less stressed. If someone addresses you, don't snap you're neck in their direction, turn it a bit more slowly instead.

12. Don't fidget – try to avoid, phase out or transform fidgety movement and nervous ticks such as shaking your leg or tapping your fingers against the table rapidly. You'll seem nervous and fidgeting can be a distracting when you try to get something across. Declutter your movements if you are all over the place. Try to relax, slow down and focus your movements.

13. Use your hands more confidently – instead of fidgeting with your hands and scratching your face use them to communicate what you are trying to say. Use your hands to describe something or to add weight to a point you are trying to make. But don't use them to much or it might become distracting. And don't let your hands flail around, use them with some control.

14. Lower your drink – don't hold your drink in front of your chest. In fact, don't hold anything in front of your heart as it will make you seem guarded and distant. Lower it and hold it beside your leg instead.

15. Realise where you spine ends – many people (including me until recently) might sit or stand with a straight back in a good posture. However, they might think that the spine ends where the neck begins and therefore crane the neck forward in a Montgomery Burns-poseYour spine ends in the back of your head. Keep you whole spine straight and aligned for better posture.

16. Don't stand too close –one of the things we learned from Seinfeld is that everybody gets weirded out by a close-talker. Let people have their personal space, don't invade it.

17. Mirror – Often when you get along with a person, when the two of you get a good connection, you will start to mirror each other unconsciously. That means that you mirror the other person's body language a bit. To make the connection better you can try a bit of proactive mirroring. If he leans forward, you might lean forward. If he puts hands in pocket, you might do the same. But don't react instantly and don't mirror every change in body language. Then weirdness will ensue.

18. Keep a good attitude – last but not least, keep a positive, open and relaxed attitude. How you feel will come through in your body language and can make a major difference. For information on how make yourself feel better read 10 ways to change how you feel and for relaxation try A very simple way to feel relaxed for 24 hours.
You can change your body language but as all new habits it takes a while. Especially things like keeping you head up might take time to correct if you have spent thousands of days looking at your feet. And if you try and change to many things at once it might become confusing and feel overwhelming.
Take a couple of these body language bits to work on every day for three to four weeks. By then they should have developed into new habits and something you'll do without even thinking about it. If not, keep on until it sticks. Then take another couple of things you'd like to change and work on them.

Story: The Stone on the Road

One day a farmer, walking down the street in a small town came across a large stone in the middle of his path. The farmer complained: "Who could be so careless as to leave such a big stone on the road? Why does someone not remove it?" He went away complaining.
The next day, the same thing happened with a milkman. He too went away grumbling but left the stone as it was.
Then one day, a student came across the stone. Worried that someone may fall over it and hurt himself, he decided to push it aside. He pushed long and hard all by himself and eventually managed to remove the stone from the path. He came back and noticed a piece of paper where the stone was kept.
He picked the paper and opened it. Inside was written, "You are the true wealth of this nation."
There are two kinds of people
Talkers and doers.
Talkers merely talk, while doers do.
 The moral of this story is that if you don't want to get involved you have no right to criticize  Become the change you wish to see in this world.
Service to society is the rent we pay for the space we occupy on this earth.

9 steps to acheive your goals

1 Define your goal
The first step is to define your goal. Perhaps you've always dreamt about running a race or learning a new language? Maybe you're determined to seek a promotion or you simply want to shed a few kilos. Consider everything. What would you do if you had more time? What would you like to accomplish in the future? What do you regret about the past? In the words of motivational speaker Les Brown (, "Your goals are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life." Whatever you choose, make sure your goal is specific, achievable and tangible.
2 Set your deadline
A goal without a deadline can be forever postponed, so set a deadline and aim to be as realistic as possible. If your goal is to lose a certain amount of weight for example, count on losing 2 pounds (around one kilo) per week. If you have your eye on that promotion, think about when your next appraisal is scheduled or another opportunity when you will have the chance to shine. Diana Scharf Hunt, author of The Tao of Time (Fireside), summed it up perfectly by saying, "Goals are dreams with deadlines."
True motivation comes from understanding your underlying purpose, so think about what that is. Ensure your goal is something that you really want and not what others want you to do. Ensure also, that the goal you have set is in line with your overall purpose. If your purpose is to get fit, then a weight-loss goal may not be in line with this - it is possible to be slim, but still be unfit. Instead, it should rather be, "To achieve the same fitness levels I had when I was 20".
Determine, and better still, write down, the benefits you expect to enjoy from reaching your goal. Ask yourself what you will achieve from conquering your goal? Defining the benefits will help you to overcome moments of weakness. Evaluate these carefully and your goals will become much more attainable and your motivation increased. Lucy Mackintosh, NLP Coach and founder of The Law of Attraction Group in Dubai ( says, "Write them on post-it notes and stick them on the fridge, in the car, on a mirror; by never losing sight of the benefits of success, your goal will remain at the forefront of your mind which will only strengthen your resolve."
You must believe your goal is achievable; unless you believe you can 100 per cent reach it, you will have no true motivation. Those who think they can and those who think they can't are both right; the power of positive thinking knows no end. According to Carolyn Mitchell, NLP Life Coach and owner of Blue Sky Life Coaching (, "Affirmations are an excellent tool to promote self-belief and assure ourselves of positive outcomes. Begin with fast forwarding to the time when you have achieved your goal. Learn what it feels like [in your mind] to experience what the success of achieving your goal means to you. Feel it or see it for yourself. Once you have learned what success feels like, you simply can't 'unlearn' it. By writing, reading and re-experiencing those feelings of success over and over again you are essentially telling yourself what you want by believing that you already have it."
Now identify your potential obstacles. When suddenly faced with obstacles it can be difficult to remain focused and energetic. They can sap your energy, time and enthusiasm. What may hinder your progress? Old habits die hard and current mindsets can be difficult to shift, but identifying the obstacles will prepare you for the road ahead - forewarned is forearmed after all. "Be perfectly honest with yourself," says Carolyn, "this is the only way to identify all the possible problem areas. And only when you identify these can you develop strategies to minimise them."
7 Seek the Solutions
Think about how you can overcome these obstacles. What in your life needs changing? This is your opportunity to plan your strategies for handling the setbacks. If you consider each obstacle, one by one, you can easily identify a suitable solution; this may mean a change to your usual routine, enlisting the support of a friend or family member or a change to your current mindset. "If you can't find the solution yourself then ask someone who has achieved a similar goal how they did it" says Lucy, "or imagine you are sitting with a role model, a top athlete, for example. Ask them what to do and then put yourself in their shoes and give the advice they would give."
Take time to imagine that you have achieved your goal. What is it like? How do you feel? Excited? Exuberant? How has your life changed? How does it look, feel or sound? Capture that moment in your head and never lose sight of it. Try to make your vision so clear that you can perceive it with all five senses. The clearer the image in your mind, the easier it is to manifest into reality or in the words of Napoleon Hill, author of Think & Grow Rich (Ballantine Books), "What the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve."
9 Create your action plan
Create a step-by-step action plan detailing exactly what you need to do to achieve the goal. Remember in step one we identified that goals are the road maps that guide you? Well think of your action plan as the specific directions to get you to your destination, via the quickest and easiest route possible. Depending on the nature of your goal, identify any major milestones necessary to achieve it, then break down each milestone into specific tasks or steps. Sometimes just knowing where to start is hard, in which case enlist the support of others, be it friends, colleagues or a support group. Be prepared to journal the process. Writing things down helps to collate our thoughts, handle potholes and identify and deal with weaknesses. Strive to make progress every day. Every single day. And tell everyone you know about your goal - accountability is a great way to ensure that you do what needs to be done
source: unknown
M Junaid Tahir

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Gossips and Rumors- How to react

Rumor, by definition, is a currently circulating story about a doubtful situation, future event or a past incident. If the rumor is based on true fact then usually it gets clarified very soon since the stake holders clear the doubts of public as soon as possible to get their necks cleaned; though sometimes they tend to hide as their respect is on stake due to the negative post effects of the story whether true or false.  

Generally speaking, rumors are either completely based on false grounds or become fragile because a lot of impurities get mixed when such stories are propagated in the society. In fact the story becomes more impure when more and more people discuss because it is human nature to add some 'spice' in the original story to make it more interesting and worth listening. Article written by Junaid.Tahir

As long as a specific rumor is not directly impacting a person's private life, he/she tends to enjoy it but sometimes some rumors have considerable mental or social consequences. For example, in our company we recently had a rumor that the senior management is going to undergo a major hierarchy changes due to which a high percentage of employees will lose their job due to cost cutting strategy of the new management. A lot of employees started gossiping in office, with their spouse and other family members due to which a ripple effect of stress was generated company-wise and at personnel and familial level. This ripple phenomenon kept on going for a couple of weeks till this morning one of the senior managers commented that most of the rumors are not true except one resignation.

So what should I do if I hear a doubtful news; below are some recommendations:
1-    Check if the source of the information is authentic. Usually people who talk about other people are in habit of commenting without being fair. Remember the quote: "Small minds discuss people, Average minds discuss events, higher minds discuss ideas and great minds act in silence"
2-   Judge the situation fairly. Find the original source of information and ask directly if possible and applicable.
3-   Discuss the matter with two to three person. If all of them have a different story then most likely the original story is lost or it is completely false. Consider the parts which are common in all stories. This will help extract the original components of the news.
4-   Don't get too much engaged in rumors however a serious advice is not to ignore the rumors completely. The news might be genuine, hence you must consider the corrective and preventive necessary measures else you may face serious consequences. You must be logical and analytical in your evaluation of the rumor.

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Junaid Tahir, a telecom engineer and a blogger, writes articles on wisdom, happiness and stress management. His personal blog can be read here