1. Go to bed at the same time.
by Jim Harris, Ph.D#
Remember the beginning of your relationship, when you couldnt wait to go to bed with each other to make love? Happy couples resist the temptation to go to bed at different times. They go to bed at the same time, even if one partner wakes up later to do things while their partner sleeps.
#2. Cultivate common interests.
After the passion settles down, its common to realize that you have few interests in common. But dont minimize the importance of activities you can do together that you both enjoy. If common interests are not present, happy couples develop them. At the same time, be sure to cultivate interests of your own; this will make you more interesting to your mate and prevent you from appearing too dependent.
#3. Walk hand in hand or side by side.
Rather than one partner lagging or dragging behind the other, happy couples walk comfortably hand in hand or side by side. They know its more important to be with their partner than to see the sights along the way.
#4. Make trust and forgiveness your default mode.
If and when they have a disagreement or argument, and if they cant resolve it, happy couples default to trusting and forgiving rather than distrusting and begrudging.
If you look for things your partner does wrong, you can always find something. If you look for what he or she does right, you can always find something, too. It all depends on what you want to look for. Happy couples accentuate the positive.
#6. Hug each other as soon as you see each other after work.
Our skin has a memory of good touch (loved), bad touch(abused) and no touch (neglected). Couples who say hello with a hug keep their skin bathed in the good touch, which can inoculate your spirit against anonymity in the world.
#7. Say I love you and Have a good day every morning.
This is a great way to buy some patience and tolerance as each partner sets out each day to battle traffic jams, long lines and other annoyances.
This tells your partner that, regardless of how upset you are with him or her, you still want to be in the relationship. It says that what you and your partner have is bigger than any single upsetting incident.
Call your partner at home or at work to see how his or her day is going. This is a great way to adjust expectations so that youre more in sync when you connect after work. For instance, if your partner is having an awful day, it might be unreasonable to expect him or her to be enthusiastic about something good that happened to you.
#10. Be proud to be seen with your partner.
Happy couples are pleased to be seen together and are often in some kind of affectionate contact hand on hand or hand on shoulder or knee or back of neck. They are not showing off but rather just saying that they belong with each other.