*Nurse*: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.


*School* A place where Parents pay and children play.

*Life Insurance* A contract that keeps you poor all your life
so that you can die Rich.


*Marriage* It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.


*Tears* The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.


*Lecture* An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"


*Conference* The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


*Conference Room* A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later. on.


*Father* A banker provided by God.


*Criminal* A person no different from the rest except that he/she got caught.


*Boss* Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early


*Politician* One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.


*DOCTOR* A person who holds your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.


*Smile* A curve that can set a lot of things straight.


*Yawn* The time some married men ever get to open their mouth.


*Etc*. A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


*Committee* Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.


*Atom Bomb* An invention to end all inventions.

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