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26 Tips For Managing #Stress

 



1. Always take time for yourself, at least 30 minutes per day.
2. Be aware of your own stress meter: Know when to step back and cool down.

3. Concentrate on controlling your own situation, without controlling
everybody else.
4. Daily exercise will burn off the stress chemicals.

5. Eat lots of fresh fruit, veggies, bread and water, give your body the best for it to perform at its best.

6. Forgive others, don't hold grudges and be tolerant -- not everyone is as capable as you.

7. Gain perspective on things, how important is the issue?

8. Hugs, kisses and laughter: Have fun and don't be afraid to share your feelings with others.

9. Identify stressors and plan to deal with them better next time.

10. Judge your own performance realistically; don't set goals out of your own reach.

11. Keep a positive attitude, your outlook will influence outcomes and the way others treat you.

12. Stop alcohol, drugs and other stimulants, they affect your perception and behaviour.

13. Manage money well, seek advice and save at least 10 per cent of what you earn.

14. No is a word you need to learn to use without feeling guilty.

15. Outdoor activities by yourself, or with friends and family, can be a great way to relax.

16. Zest for life: Each day is a gift, smile and be thankful that you are a part of the bigger picture.

17. Quit smoking: It is stressing your body daily, not to mention killing you too.

18. Relationships: Nurture and enjoy them, learn to listen more and talk less.

19. Sleep well, with a firm mattress and a supportive pillow; don't overheat yourself and allow plenty of ventilation.

20. Treat yourself once a week with some shopping, dinner out, the parks: Moderation is the key.

21. Understand things from the other person's point of view.

22. Verify information from the source before exploding.

23. Worry less, it really does not get things completed better or quicker.

24. Xpress: Make a regular retreat to your favourite space, make holidays part of your yearly plan and budget.

25. Yearly goal setting: Plan what you want to achieve based on your priorities in your career, relationships, etc.

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21 Business Skills Needed To Succeed


21 business skills needed to succeed
The greatest people in business have certain attributes in common. Several personal qualities are important, like a thirst for continuous education, personal drive and motivation, strong goals and ambition, clear vision, and always a great deal of passion.
Beyond those personal qualities though, what makes a successful business person stand out from the crowd? Here are 21 business skills you need if you want to get ahead:

Communication

1. Written - Most people in business spend a lot of time communicating in writing. While the inter-office memo and the fax are old hat, you will spend a good few hours a day fighting your inbox. Add to this reports, white papers, proposals and resumes, it's certain you will need to sharpen your word power to succeed.
2. Social Networking – We are not all social gadflys, some of us struggle to make small talk. It is a key skill to learn though, it is true what they say, sometimes it is more who you know than  what!
3. Speaking – Public speaking ranks high amongst the worlds most popular fears. You must overcome it and the best way is to practice. It might feel more comfortable working from the safety of your desk but at some point you are going to have to present. Better to have some experience under your belt before being forced to perform unprepared when it really counts.
4. Sales – You might think you do not need to sell but we all sell every day. From even before your first day you will be selling, starting at your interview all the way to asking the boss for a raise. In  normal life we sell, persuading your partner that you really need that new purchase, getting out of that parking ticket … persuasion skills can come in very handy indeed.
5. Negotiation – If you can't sell perhaps you can negotiate. A lot of the skills are the same but you will find people who have been in business for a while can drive a hard bargain. If you do not have the skills you will lose out each and every time.

Planning

1. Strategic – A business that lurches from one crisis to another is not going to stay around very long. Obviously if you are in charge then you have to set the marching orders. Can you clearly see the road ahead?
2. Project – I know many people in business who see their role as the hot headed maverick that shoots from the hip and flies from the seat of their pants. Unfortunately most of them eventually crash and burn. Project management makes your life and that of your team less stressful and gets things done on time and on budget. It might not be the white knuckle ride that some enjoy but at least you will be able to clock off at a reasonable hour!
3. Financial – The top reason why businesses go out of business is bad financial planning. All the cash flows in the wrong direction. Having worked through the dotcom boom and bust I have seen first hand what too big a budget in the wrong hands can do. Someone needs a firm grip on the numbers and it had better be you otherwise someone might just take a trip to a tropical island at your expense.
4. Risk – I'm a natural worrier which though it annoys my wife, does have the advantage in business that I tend to see the potential potholes and bear traps in any plan. If you can imagine a risk you can set about to mitigate it.
5. Logistics – Money is just one resource you need. Any business has inputs and outputs. You need to have the right people in the right jobs with what they need when they need it to get their work done. Logistics might not put you on the cover of Time magazine but it could make you a hero in your office.

Productivity

1. Time management – I once had a boss who could never get to a single meeting on time. He would always turn up ten minutes late, red-faced, unprepared, looking like he had slept in a bush. He had a growing collection of speeding tickets and a bigger collection of excuses and apologies. Time management reduces stress and increases your respect.
2. Meeting management - Most of us hate meeting but they are a fact of business life. There are always the few who love them as a way to avoid real work. There are many tricks from firmly sticking to the agenda through to holding meetings standing up just before lunch. Whatever works for you if you can get meetings to be productive and under control you will get ahead.
3. Leadership – In the Dilbert universe leadership might be something you step in, but in business it really helps to be able to take the lead. Can you get people to follow you? Are you able to get people to do things they don't want to do for the good of the team?
4. Systems – If you are repeatedly re-inventing the wheel there is something seriously wrong. Effective systems bring consistency, efficiency and reduced costs. Learning how to create and implement both human and automated systems can go a long way to being more competitive.
5. Personal Productivity – What are your rhythms, when are you more sociable, detail-oriented, creative or lacking energy? Where do you excel and which areas are a struggle? Before you can lead anyone else you need to work out how to get the best out of yourself.

Creativity

1. Imagination – Many people neglect their creative side feeling that it is better to be all about the logic, but in fact some of the most successful business people are also the most imaginative.
2. Inventiveness – If you can imagine it you can create it, and if you create it then you can sell it! Look around you, think of the things you buy and use, someone had to have the idea before it was built and sold to you. You might be surprised how few mad inventors there are, more products are invented in a marketing office than a garage.
3. Problem Solving – A big part of surviving in business is about solving problems fast and effectively. An employee who is good at keeping their head in a crisis while fighting fires is a worthwhile asset to any business.
4. Brainstorming – Some people think brainstorming is all about having stupid ideas while ridiculing the contributions of everyone else while drinking coffee, eating cookies and flirting with the secretary from floor 2. Perhaps this is why brainstorms get a bad name? If you can brainstorm great ideas, fast then you will be one step ahead.
5. Making connections - Some of the best ideas have simply been about connecting two otherwise unconnected ideas together. Could you invent the next iPhone?
I am sure the sharp-eyed amongst you have noticed there are only 20 points in this list. What is number 21? Perhaps the most important skill of all; the ability to switch off! It is so easy for the stresses and strains of business life to burn people out so you must develop the ability to relax and unwind.
Source: BusinessSchool

7 Qualities of Great Spirits

 
Everyone now a days is craving for peace of mind through monetary achievements approach however what people don't understand is that materialistic achievements provide temporary happiness but not the long lasting state of abundance. On the contrary, a person possessing a Great Spirit regardless of being poor or rich can have the great contentment state of mind. 
 
You may think that practicing the qualities of Great Spirit is not an easy job and only special people can develop and practice such traits, I would disagree with you. You must remember that all people are born with the same principles of nature (including you) however successful and peaceful people are those who have the tendency to learn things which are good for their body, heart and soul !!! Having said that, below are the 8 qualities which you must strive for in order to join the league of Great Spirits and enjoy the ultimate mental and spiritual happiness:

1-     Great Spirits lack in the ability to conflict, complain, curse, conspire and criticise. (More details about 6Cs can be read here.) They mind their own business. They have least tendency of discussing people. They believe in the fact that small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, higher minds discuss ideas and great minds act in silence.
2-    They are implosive and optimistic with solid control on their mood swings. They are highly adaptable and resilient to most of the stretched circumstances by having strong control on their negative thoughts.


                
3-    They believe that nothing else but others will remember them on how they made them feel. Hence they are empathic and emotionally intelligent in judging others situations and feelings in order to resolve their crisis to make them feel good. They have frequent attacks of smiling and laughter to keep others happy.
4-    They enjoy the present, forget the past and don't get worried too much about the future. They have a great tendency of living in needs instead of wants hence they have absence of greed in their nature.
5-    They believe that being thankful is the open door to abundance hence they possess high degree of gratitude. The spiritual people keep reminding themselves that what if they woke up next day with the only blessings they were thankful for yesterday. The Feeling of gratitude strengthens the degree of contentment. They remember the quote "When Your Head is on the Pillow and the Day is Almost Done – Count God's blessings, Count Them One by One"
6-    They believe in simplicity instead of being socially sensitive. They understand that its perfectly alright not to follow each fashion trend or buy a new luxury car which their friends have because comparing themselves with others is an insulting act. Also pleasing everybody will never bring long lasting peace in their lives.
7-    They listen more and speak less. If they speak, they speak what is positive, important or beneficial for others. They know that when a person speaks more he/she is on the verge of making more mistakes hence spiritually strong people listen more and speak less.

While it may take time to develop these habits however once you make concrete commit with yourself for the pursuit of happiness through practicing these qualities, the journey would become much easier and the fruits of your efforts would be very sweet and long lasting.   



About Author, Junaid Tahir is a telecom engineer and a passionate blogger. He writes articles on Leadership and Stress Management at his personal blog. His Google Group can be joined here. He is reachable at mjunaidtahir@gmail.com for any kind of constructive feedback.

7 Ways to be More Organized

By Junaid Tahir


Why Staying organized helps?

Staying organized has many advantages in terms of having more time for yourself and family; in terms of saving money; peace of mind, better health, balanced life and improved professional/Social life.
Below are some considerations on how to be more Organized and consequently get the benefits mentioned above.


How to stay organized?

1.     Use files or folders to place all your Personal documents. Segregate your documents and place different kind of documents in different files. For example utility bills, educational documents and purchase receipts to be placed in three different files. If you want you can scan (or take a picture from your mobile) and put it in your email for quick reference. Make sure your password is safe! Advantage:Saves time and avoid stress to find the relevant document. 

2.    Differentiate between urgent and important tasks. Important tasks sooner or later will come out to be either very fruitful (if you have given them proper attention) or would be a complete disaster (if you have avoided them). Advantage: Attending Urgent tasks in timely manner will ensure healthy outcome in terms of family, personal, financial or professional life. You may want to read my article athttp://paradigmwisdom.blogspot.com/2012/01/learn-to-differentiate-between-urgent.html 
  3.    You need to closely observe your Time stealers. the routine tasks which takes away a lot of time but do not produce real good results should be optimized. Advantage: You will have more control on your time and arrange it for family & self matters.

4.    Place your things at right locations. Allocate proper drawers, boxes, cabinets, Files, balcony for accessories. Advantage: you don't have to waste your time when you need something

5.    Google Calendar is a great service which sends you email and SMS for any event which you store in your online Calendar. You can set reminders for next car service, tires replacement, remembering birthdays & anniversaries and so on. Advantage: you will save money by avoiding disasters (car malfunctioning etc), you will have healthy family relations (birthdays etc) 

6.    Make a to-do list. Maintain it on daily/weekly basis. Use 'post-it' notes for shopping list. Advantage:Critical tasks will not be missed. Unnecessary market revisits will be avoided.
  7.    If you are Muslim, your Prayers timings can make you punctual and give you the convenience to organize a lot of events in-between two prayers. You can become a role model for others by being organized this way.

Stay organized for a concrete grip on your life starting today.

8 Steps to Anger Management for Kids

8 Steps to Anger Management for Kids
Do your kids make you feel like an ogre when you set limits? Does the word "no" kick off whining, yelling and protests?  How many times have you heard your nine-year-old say something like: "That's not fair! Brandon's mom lets him watch Sons of Anarchy!"  Or does this sound familiar:  "Jessica's dad lets her stay out 'til 10 on school nights! Why can't you?"
"It's important to help your child look at what was happening and what they were thinking that triggered their angry response."
It can be hard to know sometimes if the limits you set are reasonable or not, especially when your kids are howling that "everyone else is allowed to do it!"On top of that, how do you know that the limits you set even work? Whether you are just beginning to set limits, or are adjusting your limits to match your child's unique needs and developmental changes, here are some tips to make setting limits, and feeling confident about those limits, easier.
  1. Start from your values. Be clear about the values you want to instill in your family. If eating dinner together at home is important, make that an expectation. If treating people fairly is essential, make sure your limits support that. Knowing that your limits are based on your values helps during those times when your child pushes back and says you're the worst parent in the world. You'll find it easier to resist giving in to that argument.
  2. Communicate the limits. Try saying to your child something like, "Things are going to change, and you can expect that dad and I will deal with your behavior differently." Or, "Now that you're older, we need to have some rules about going to parties."  Then let your child know the limits and the consequences for either following or not following the rules. Be clear and specific. This is not a one-time event, but rather a process that will likely take repeated refresher discussions along the way.
  3. Monitor how your child responds. What did your child do? Not immediately, because change is a process and takes time, but over time.  Are you able to observe some improvement in behavior, even if it's slight? For instance, you set curfew for your teen, and at first he didn't seem to care.  But when you started to take the car keys away, he began to come home closer and closer to the curfew.  Now he is routinely coming in on time.

    For younger kids, it may be helpful to have a chart or calendar where behaviors are recorded.  Kids often like to participate in this activity, especially if they get to put the sticker on the chart for behaving correctly. For older kids, charting behavior helps them get a better perspective on their ability to change over time.  Even if they had a terrible day yesterday, they can see that they've been doing so much better during the past few weeks, and so there's hope for continued success.
  4. Be matter-of-fact. Try not to personalize the misbehavior. If your child starts to feel the power to "hurt" you with his misbehavior, this can easily lead to manipulative behavior. Instead, focus on the behavior and your child's need to change. Help them understand that the misbehavior is hurtful to them and worth changing. If you are angry, wait to talk with your child until your anger has cooled.  You can say, "I'm not ready to talk with you right now.  I'll talk with you when I am. Just wait".
  5. Be prepared. Do you sometimes just react to your child's misbehavior, handing down whatever punishment happens to come to mind?  Instead, try sitting down and calmly thinking about what behavior you are trying to target.  Then you can think more clearly about what consequence would be most effective in promoting change.  Develop a list of meaningful consequences in a quiet moment. You know your kids best, what they hold near and dear. Consequences are most impactful when your child really cares either about avoiding the loss of something (computer time, going to her friends overnight, the car, the concert) or about gaining something (time with dad, a hiking trip with friends, an overnight, the car, a concert).

    Remember, it's important for both parents to share any plan that is developed and be on the same page, or at least be willing to support each other in the process.
  6. Consequences need time limits. You need to set limits and impose consequences that allow your child to grow and change. Part of this is setting limits with appropriate timeframes. Younger kids have a very different sense of time than adults. A weeklong consequence for a six-year-old may feel never-ending to her, where your 10-year-old can more easily feel like there's some light at the end of the tunnel. If you ground your teen for the rest of his life, (while you may definitely feel that way at the time) he will immediately know that you are setting a limit you can't hold him to.

    For some kids, it's helpful to set limits in small increments so they can experience success. "If you are able to make it through this evening without fighting with your brother, you will earn back 20 minutes of computer time tomorrow night." Having do-able steps is especially important for kids with moderate to severe behavior problems as they can often experience failure and feelings of defeat.
  7. Monitor yourself. Watch that you're not falling into old patterns of screaming and yelling or ignoring misbehavior. It's difficult for us, too, as parents to change.  Keep at it.
  8. Start limit setting early.  It's much harder to begin setting limits for the first time when your child is a teenager whose "job" it is to push back on limits, especially those set by parents. But remember, you can start any time.
  9. Change doesn't happen overnight. When things don't seem to be working, try looking for the little changes you can observe in your own behavior—even if they aren't yet impacting your child. Did you make a plan and stick with it? Did you make a decision and hold firm? Were you able to tell your child what you expected of him without screaming and yelling? If you did any of these things, you are making progress.

    There may be relapses by you or your child. You may get "lazy" about follow-through; or your child who was doing so well playing at recess gets into a fight. Keep small set-backs in perspective, and try thinking one day at a time. It may also be time to review your limits and consequences and see if they need adjusting.
  10. Don't look for validation from your child. If you're looking for validation from your kids, you're giving them too much power. Their job is not to be your friend, or to thank you for setting limits to help them control their behavior. Part of being a parent is setting limits, teaching better behaviors, and coaching your children as they begin to use those improved behaviors. This is a hard job, and at times you can feel pretty alone. Talk to other parents who you trust. Discuss the problems with your partner, and support each other in the changes. Talk with a teacher or guidance counselor who understands your child and some of the unique challenges he or she presents.
Parents often feel that by setting limits, they will lose their child's love. Just the opposite is true. Kids need limits, and count on parents to set those for them to keep them safe and help them grow. Setting limits is an act of love.
As you start setting and holding your children to more consistent limits, you might feel that you are being overly strict.  Aiming for consistency may also feel rigid to parents who are used to a looser household. Remember that limit-setting is just one part of effective parenting and needs to be paired with teaching and coaching. Children aren't going to change their behavior simply due to limits.  Kids also need parents to teach better problem-solving skills and to coach them as they try out the new skills and behaviors. They may never say thank you, but setting limits is one of the best gifts you can give your child.

Read more: EmpoweringParents

Older but Wiser!

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As we grow older hence wiser, we slowly realise that wearing a $300.00 or a $30.00 watch, they both tell the same time.


Whether we carry a $300.00 or a $30.00 wallet/handbag,  the amount of money inside is the same.

Whether we drink a bottle of $300.00  or a $10.00, the hangover is the same.

Whether the house we live in is 300 or 3000 sq. ft., loneliness is the same.

You will realise true inner happiness does not come from the material things of this world.  Whether you fly first or economy class, if the plane goes down, you go down with it.

Therefore, I hope you realise when you have mates, buddies old friends, brothers and  sisters, who you chat with, laugh with, talk with, have fun with, talk about north-south-east-west or heaven earth, that is true happiness.

Be Confident And The Rest Will Follow!



Your confidence will depend on how strongly you believe in your intention. Your intention is your goal or desire. Without intent any action is useless and meaningless, and your words will be utterly devoid of power. To be successful you need to formulate, focus on, and put all your mental energy towards your intention.

Think of it this way; although we know we can never truly be certain as to the exact outcome of any event, we can be certain about our intent. Your intent will give you outcome you want to achieve.

Also it helps, before you do anything, to go inside and say to yourself confidently and powerfully, in the most authoritative voice, 'Of course I can do this!'

Say that again and again so that you believe it, 'Of course I can do this". You'll notice that the mere fact that you are saying that inside your mind that causes you to accept and believe the fact that you will be successful. So, while we can never truly be certain about the specifics of any interaction or outcome, we can always be certain about our intent.

I also want to point out this important fact - confidence isn't certainty. This is true for anything in life. You can be confident, but you can never be certain of anything.

I know that I'm very confident, but even with all my confidence, sometimes things don't work out the way I want them to. That happens. However I also know that even though I am confident I know HOW to do something, and I have the ABILITY to do it, if it doesn't work, it is not going to erode my confidence. I know if I am consistent and focus on my intent the things WILL happen.

My point here is this - never get discouraged. With a little practice and focusing on your intent, you WILL be very successful. So just "BE" confident and the rest will follow.


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Don't Look Back

quotes.land



If you carefully observe the people who are in stress, you will notice that they keep thinking about a specific event, conversation, failure, brawl or hard luck again and again which has happened to them in past. Such people do not have control on their thinking process hence they allow their brain to keep wandering in the past. While It's a known fact that bad luck happens to everyone, it's people's attitude and the quantum of reaction which defines the degree of stress. Since stress and happiness are vice versa so more stress results in less happiness or in some cases loss of happiness. Article written by Junaid.Tahir

Always remember that everyone passes through tragic moments in life however 
you will agree that the more you think about bad things happened in the past, the more magnitude of stress you give birth to.    Hence the chains of negativity and stress around your neck need to be broken and thrown away so as to move on with your life. 

The fact remains the same that you cannot change the past, neither you can boil the ocean so a wise person would not keep thinking about something which has already happened instead he would learn the lesson from the past and take measures which need to be done in order to prevent such happening in future. A wise man will always focus on the solutions instead of thinking about the problems.  Article written by Junaid.Tahir
So here is what I recommend: 
Take a pen and list down all the issues bothering you right now. You will, eventually, end up with a very limited number of issues causing depression back and forth. Now the next step is to split these issues into two groups. One group for which you do have some solution and the other group should contain the issues which are out of control. The worries and sorrows from the second group should be shun away. You need to train your brain not to think of something which is beyond control. Divert your focus on the issues for which you can do something. Do it now because this time will also become past and you would be cursing these moments for taking action at right time.

You may want to read my articles on stress by clicking here
About Author: Junaid Tahir, a telecom engineer and a blogger, writes articles on wisdom, happiness and stress management. His articles can be read Here

Story: The Surprise Test



One day a professor entered the classroom and asked his students to prepare for a surprise test. They waited anxiously at their desks for the test to begin. The professor handed out the question paper, with the text facing down as usual.
 
Once he handed them all out, he asked his students to turn the page and begin. To everyone's surprise, there were no questions....just a black dot in the center of the page. The professor seeing the expression on everyone's face, told them the following: "I want you to write what you see there."
 
The students confused, got started on the inexplicable task. At the end of the class, the professor took all the answer papers and started reading each one of them aloud in front of all the students. All of them with no exceptions, described the black dot, trying to explain its position in the middle of the sheet, etc. etc. etc.
 
After all had been read, the classroom silent, the professor began to explain: "I am not going to grade you on this; I just wanted to give you something to think about. No one wrote about the white part of the paper. Everyone focused on the black dot - and the same happens in our lives. We have a white paper to observe and enjoy, but we always focus on the dark spots.
 
Our life is a gift given to us by God, with love and care, and we always have reasons to celebrate - nature renewing itself everyday, our friends around us, the job that provides our livelihood, the miracles we see everyday.
 
However we insist on focusing only on the dark spots - the health issues that bother us, the lack of money, the complicated relationship with a family member, the disappointment with a friend and so on.
 
The dark spots are very small compared to everything we have in our lives, but they are the ones that pollute our minds. Take your eyes away from the black spots in your life. Enjoy each one of your blessings, each moment that life gives you. Be happy and live a life filled with LOVE,"
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Every Negative Experience



Every negative experience leaves a negative mark on our mind. 


When We talk about that to someone, they too would be influenced. 


In the same way, when someone talks about others, it creates negativity in our minds too. 


Although we did not have that negative experience, we tend to carry the unnecessary burden of negativity. 

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