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Are You Your Own Best Friend?

Thriving Through Adversity Have you faced difficult times in your life? Have there been times when life or circumstances just didn't...

Thriving Through Adversity

Have you faced difficult times in your life? Have there been times when life or circumstances just didn't seem fair? Have you struggled just to survive at times? Have you felt like you are all alone? Have you felt like the pain would never end? These feelings and these pains are real. You need to acknowledge them and feel the emotions. You may need to cry or scream or kick things. That is ok…just do it and then let it go! And that is the hard part…letting go, moving on, getting past it. Our ego mind likes to keep us engaged and angry or getting back.

The problems arise when you stay stuck in that place and can't find your way out. I have found that people cripple themselves or limit themselves with old thoughts and beliefs that no longer serve them yet they still stay stuck. If you don't step back and recognize the fact that you are stuck…you won't be able to move forward in life. It is all about looking in the mirror to see what you are unconsciously doing to yourself and then making a conscious decision to face the other direction.

It is all about changing your thoughts, feelings and emotions because what you think, feel and believe will become your reality every single time without exception. Clients ask me if you have to fake it until you make it. You can look at it that way if that is the only way you can get out of your hole but I prefer to look at it a little differently. I choose to start focusing on and finding what is right in my life. Instead of wallowing in pain and what is wrong or who did what…I slowly start to turn to face the other direction by finding what is right…even if it is small. One baby step at a time will get you to where you want to go. Finding things to be grateful for every moment of every day. What is right? What is good?

The reality of it is, you have to learn to become your own support system as no-one else will do it for you. When facing tough times or uncertainty, you have to learn to turn off or shut down that part of your mind I call the ego which is where fear, worry, anxiety and sadness reside. You instead need to begin to follow your internal barometer…which is deep within your heart. it is different way of thinking and being.

The good news is the pain is there for a very good reason. Every pain you experience will give you more strength. You truly do gain from pain. Think about it, most of us don't want change or tend to go to self-help books or workshops when in joy and bliss. So when you face adversity or uncertainty…see it as a gift. It is a time for growth and expansion. This is when you will grow the most. Don't resist it…cry if you need to, mourn or stomp and throw things if it helps. But once you have acted out, just release it and begin to turn to healing and moving forward and not staying stuck in your grief or problem. It is a wakeup call for you and you are the only one that can control this. You are the only one that can make a choice to move forward. It's not about saying when I get there…I will have peace or I will have happiness. There is no waiting…it is all about choosing to thrive today, in this moment.

You don't have to feel disconnected or numbness. You don't have to get to the point where you say…" I have this terrible life…but I don't see options so I will put up with it." What we all deeply want is to feel good. We just want to be happy. We just want to feel good inside…to be happy inside with peace of mind. It is available right now. For every single one of you. You just have to choose it. Make a conscious decision to choose happiness and peace of mind right now in this moment. It is about changing your belief system, how you think, how you feel and most importantly how you talk to your self every single day. Make a commitment to yourself to go through this life as your own best friend.