Humor: Stunning Senior Moment

A very self-important college freshman attending a recent football game took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation. 'You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one,' the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear. 'The young people of today are much more advanced than people your age. We grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon and the internet. We have cell phones, nuclear energy,electric and hydrogen cars, computers, automated manufacturing, amazing technologies, ...and,'pausing to take another drink of beer. The senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said,

'You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young... so we invented them. Now, you arrogant little shit, what are YOU doing for the next generation ?’The applause was resounding… I love senior citizens

Inspirational Story: The Butterfly

When he was a small boy, he had loved butterflies. Oh, not to net and mount them, but to wonder at their designs and habits.

Now a grown man with his first son to be born in a few weeks, he found himself once again fascinated with a cocoon. He had found it at the side of the park path. Somehow the twig had been knocked from the tree and the cocoon had survived undamaged and still woven to the branch.

As he had seen his mother do, he gently protected it by wrapping it in his handkerchief and carried it home. The cocoon found a temporary home in a wide-top mason jar with holes in the lid. The jar was placed on the mantle for easy viewing and protection from their curious cat who would delight in volleying the sticky silk between her paws.

The man watched. His wife's interest lasted only a moment, but he studied the silky envelope. Almost imperceptibly at first, the cocoon moved. He watched more closely and soon the cocoon was trembling with activity. Nothing else happened. The cocoon remained tightly glued to the twig and there was no sign of wings.

Finally the shaking became so intense, the man thought the butterfly would die from the struggle. He removed the lid on the jar, took a sharp pen knife from his desk drawer, and carefully made a tiny slit in the side of the cocoon. Almost immediately, one wing appeared and then outstretched the other. The butterfly was free!

It seemed to enjoy its freedom and walked along the edge of the mason jar and along the edge of the mantle. But it didn't fly. At first the man thought the wings needed time to dry, but time passed and still the butterfly did not take off.
The man was worried and called up his neighbor who taught high school science. He told the neighbor how he had found the cocoon, placed it in the mason jar, and the terrible trembling as the butterfly struggled to get out. When he described how he had carefully made a small slit in the cocoon, the teacher stopped him. "Oh, that is the reason. You see, the struggle is what gives the butterfly the strength to fly."

And so it is with us. Sometimes it's the struggles in life that strengthen us the most.

Author Unknown || Source: Inspire21 || Picture Pixabay
Tags: #Inspiration #hardwork #dailytenminutes

Good and Bad Food - According to Your Mood

When we are feeling down, stressed, or tired, we often turn to food as a quick fix. This is not necessarily a bad choice, unless, of course, you're eating the wrong thing. In various situations there are foods that can help you feel better, while there are others that will make you feel worse. Here’s a short list of foods you should and shouldn’t be eating according to how you are feeling.


When you feel stressed, grabbing a can of soda may feel like the perfect way to relax. However, studies have shown that people who drink two or more cans of soda per day are more likely to be depressed and anxious. In addition, most sodas contain a lot of sugar and other chemicals, most of which are not at all healthy. Do yourself a favor and grab a low-fat yogurt and add a handful of nuts for a truly relaxing snack. The lysine, amino acids, and arginine, found in yogurt, reduce levels of anxiety and stress in the body.

It’s no shame to feel depressed, and many people experience depression at some point in their life. When feeling depressed, a lot of people turn to sweet snacks, which can lead to obesity. If you are craving white chocolate, stop and grab a bar of dark chocolate instead (70% or higher is best). The cocoa in the chocolate contains a chemical that induces euphoria, but white chocolate contains none. So if you want to turn that frown upside down, eat dark chocolate.

Feeling Fat

Soup sounds like a great alternative to eating solid foods, and it often feels less “heavy” on the stomach. However, unless you’re making that soup yourself, best stay away from canned soups and opt for something more nutritious. Many canned soups are filled with high quantities of sodium, which may cause you to retain its liquids. The excess liquids in your stomach will make you feel heavier and possibly nauseous. So make yourself a lean meal of grilled chicken breast instead. It’s full of proteins that serve as an energy boost, and will help your muscles grow, as well as burn more calories and fat in the long run.
Low Energy

Nothing feels more like an effective booster when you’re tired than a big cup of coffee. But what you might not know is that your Frappuccino is filled with 61 grams of sugar, which will cause a serious spike in your glycemic index and lead to an even worse crash later on. If you want an energy boost, eat some Trail Mix, containing potassium, magnesium, and other nutrients that will keep you more alert and awake for longer.

Can't Sleep

We all know that if we want to sleep, we should drink a cup of warm milk, right? This popular remedy is actually the worst thing you can drink before going to bed. The protein in the milk increases your alertness, and the fat in the milk slows down your metabolism, which disrupts your sleep. If you want to have a good night’s sleep, grab a small bowl of popcorn instead. The carbohydrates in the popcorn cause the brain to secrete serotonin – a chemical that relaxes your brain. Oh, and forget the butter, the fat found in it will also ruin your sleep.

Tags: #Health. #DailyTenMinutes 

Declutter Your Life in No Time At All

Declutter Your Life

If you’re like most of us, at some point you’re likely to come to the conclusion that your life is too cluttered. You have too much to do and aren’t able to handle your schedule optimally. You probably own too much stuff and just keep adding more every day.
Most people would probably be better off with at least a little decluttering. But how do you go about it? When you’re under a pile of clutter, commitments, personal files, and a load of digital information, how do you even get started with decluttering?

Follow these tips for decluttering your life:

1. Simply get started. Pick a room, a closet, or a shelf and get started. Pick up each item once and ask yourself, “Do I use this regularly? Do I love this item?” If the answer to both questions is “no” then the item needs to be sold, donated, or given away. Have a box for each of those categories to put your discarded items in.
  • Put away the items that you’re keeping in their proper place.
  • If you have a lot of stuff, it might seem overwhelming. Try setting a timer and just work for 10 minutes. Limit your decluttering to one small area for those 10 minutes. That way, you’ll really be able to see some progress.
  • Try not to get carried away by spending too much time. Working on decluttering for 10 minutes a day for a month is a lot better than overloading yourself and quitting after 2 days.
2. Go a little further each day. Once you’ve gotten started with your decluttering, keep moving forward. Finish one area and then move on to the next. Your enemy is perfection. It doesn’t have to be perfect. Simply do a good job in a reasonable amount of time. Any work you’re putting into this will result in progress. Make it easy on yourself.
  • Get some help. Some of us really are pack rats and can’t seem to let go of anything. If that sounds like you, get a reasonable friend to help. The ideal friend will have a clutter-free home that you envy.
  • Take the time to enjoy the new clutter-free spaces you’ve created in order to help keep the momentum going.
3. Declutter your calendar and digital life. Your living environment is only one aspect of your life. Simplifying how you spend your time and handle your digital life is important, too.
  • Decluttering your calendar is about learning to say “no” to commitments that aren’t important to you. Make a list of commitments and put them in order from most important to least important. Keep the top few and remove the rest from your life.
  • Start decluttering your digital life. Prioritize the blogs, newsletters, social networks, emails, and so on. Only keep the things that really matter.
4. It’s important to include others in your home. If the other people in your home aren’t on the same page, decluttering is much more challenging.
  • Focus on telling them about the benefits they’ll receive if the home is much less cluttered. Share the benefits of decluttering their space.
  • If there’s too much resistance, keep your focus on decluttering and maintaining your own space.
  • Getting rid of things can be contagious. You’ll likely find that everyone else in your household will jump on the bandwagon when they see how great your personal space looks.
Decluttering your life is more beneficial than you probably realize. It’s not only easier to find things, but you’ll have adequate space to put everything away in its proper place. Clutter weighs on your mind 24/7, whether you realize it or not. Avoid letting it stress you out or take over your life.
You’ll be surprised at how much more relaxed you feel when the clutter is out of your life for good. Give it a try today!
The post Declutter Your Life in No Time At All appeared first on My Self Improvement Daily.

Mind Your Language

Your tongue (tone) can make or break any relationship.

Meaningful relationships are priceless pearls in our lives. It takes years, hard labor, tolerance and patience to build any relationship. But one harsh word or wrong choice of words or wrong tone can break what you have taken years to build – RELATIONSHIPS. Our tongue, this boneless two inch piece of flesh in our mouth, can be our best friend or worst enemy. ‘An arrow or word, once out, cannot be retrieved’. Think before you ink... Harsh and unkind words help no one, least of all you.

Sequence of such outbursts may start with ‘harmless negative thoughts of seemingly no consequence' getting converted into spoken words, thus endorsing and stamping what has come to your mind to start with.

In fact, it’s a long sequence. Thought into words, spoken words getting converted into actions, repeated action into habits, bad or good habits become our character, good or bad, and finally, our character leading to our destiny. This is unstoppable. So, the best is to root out all negative thoughts or shun negativity from our mind to start with, which ultimately becomes our destiny.

Change the way you think, change the way you speak, have trust in God and in God, you will find everything, explicit faith which makes everything possible, hope which makes things work fine, harmony and meaning in our relationships, peace which will make a serene and tranquil setting for you in life and love, which makes everything beautiful.
Thus life cannot be lived better if you control that two inch boneless piece in our mouth.
Article source: Unknowntags: #DailyTenMinutes #relationship #MindYourLanguage

Enhance Your Children's Memory

You may wonder how you manage to remember information for a test. Parents often worry how well their children are learning and whether schools are meeting educational standards. Parents and teachers have big dreams that their children and students should become successful in their life. But, whether you succeed or not, all depends on this one aspect: your mind. Your mind matters and what matters more is your memory. Memory has three stages which include sensory information (replica of what you see and hear/ also called encoding), short-term memory (active/working memory also called storage) and long-term memory (permanent memory/retrieval). Learning is the outcome of memory and learning depends on how well you have processed the information. As ability to recall information is needed for students, the information they learn should be passed on from the short term memory to long term memory in order to retain information during exams, tests or whenever required.

Here are some tips for learning that will enhance your ability to recall information and achieve excellent results:

How much is too much: There’s a need to understand the span of attention of students and their capacity to store information in their working memory. It is not educationally sound to impose on the students huge amount of information for long period of time, this will leave them confused and clueless. Instead, giving them limited information for study and helping them to learn with vigour will aid in retaining the information for a longer period of time.

1. Adding Emotion: Anything taught with the element of emotion will be easily retained in our memory. This means students are likely to recall information that induces an emotional response. Teachers can use this tactic in English, History and Science classes. For example: if the lesson is on galaxy, the teacher can induce emotions in the students by showing them videos or pictures of the galaxy and stars.

2. Reading, writing and recollecting: Anything which is read out loudly will enhance your retention than just reading it. Writing down the important points or facts will help in retention and will be useful while studying for exams. Recollecting is the ability to retain the information after reading and writing. If you have encoded the information efficiently then you will be able to retrieve the information.

3. Rehearsal: It is said ‘Practice makes a man perfect’, therefore, rehearsing information till you master any concept is very important. Rehearsal improves your memory and gets etched onto your long-term memory. Also, rehearsing the right information is essential because unlearning the inaccurate information which is passed on to the long-term memory will be a challenging task. Hence, practice over time and ace your exams without cramming all information in one night.

4. Give meaning: If there is any subject which has many names, dates and figures; then it is always better to associate these facts with something. Giving meaning to meaningless concepts or information through ways such as poems, mnemonics, music and rhythm will improve retention of this information for future use. Nevertheless, you can use an aid such as chunking which plays a significant role in enhancing the short term memory transfer to long term memory. Chunking numbers, colours or aspects in groups helps in remembering and learning the concepts faster.

5. Make connections: It is vital to make connections or associations between the new information and the previously learnt information. The higher the number of associations made, the more chances of retaining that information easily and this in turn induces your memory power through which you can retrace the information easily.

6. Avoid distractions: While studying, choose a quiet and peaceful environment, comfortable seating and table, bright light, proper ventilation and avoid distracting things around you. Here, distracting elements include anything that diverts your attention, for instance: video games, T.V., music player, phones, and the like. While studying, if distraction persists then encoding the information suffers leading to forgetting. Hence, for encoding to be efficient you shouldn’t give ways to distraction instead concentrate and give maximum attention to avoid the inability to retrieve information.

7. Get some rest: Take a break between learnings. You have heard that ‘All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy’, so take breaks after few hours of studying and relax your mind. Not only breaks but physical exercise and sound sleep strengthens your ability to retain the information. Sleep is very crucial to boost your memory. Sleep helps us learn new information and pass the information to the long-term memory. However, for most of the problems including imbalance of mind and body, stress, preparing for exams- the best prescription commonly given is get some sleep! So, say goodbye to cramming all night.

8. Teach others to help you revise better: Whatever you have learnt will be useful when you share that knowledge to another person. So, one of the best ways to learn is to teach what you’ve learnt to another person. This is the reason why teachers have mastered the concepts they teach because they have to teach the same lessons and concepts to many batches in school. Adding to this, if the concepts are thought using real life stories and examples or experiments, then the students are likely to remember them for life because anything visual stimulates our attention and learning takes place faster.

9. Questioning enhances learning: Asking questions like why, how, what helps in learning concepts well because here the reasoning, thinking and analysis is involved. Anything which triggers our mental processors helps in learning the concepts faster and better. Finding answers to these questions makes memory work out as all the mental processors are involved making the memory charged and active. Besides, another way to ask question is by taking the quizzes or tests which will help in reasoning and in a way enhance your memory power. Here, the end process will be getting feedback from the tests which plays a vital role in knowing what is right and what is wrong. All this collectively heightens your memory power because your brain is at its maximum functionality.

These are the ways which will help you learn efficiently and remember information so that they can be retrieved whenever in need. If these procedures are followed anyone can learn anything quickly and retrace the information efficiently. However, all these procedures have to be followed in a systematic way and one shouldn’t end up multi-tasking... The reason is because our brain processes and stores the information systematically. This is not practiced then certain glitches can occur in the process of learning which will lead to forgetting. Now, you know that the old myths of rote learning don’t work.

These guidelines will help students as it will help them reason and learn using the above methods which will have a great impact on the way they can retrieve information whenever asked for. Therefore, retention depends on how well you make use of these sure-fire ways to become more effective learner by simply enhancing your memory power for excellent results. Ultimately, don’t forget that remembering is a skill that takes lot of practice and learning is a life-long process and has to go on for our existence on earth. So, happy learning as memory is like a computer, you need to press Ctrl + S (Save) for all important information, press Backspace for all irrelevant information and press Delete for unused/useless information. Now F5 (Refresh) your mind and practice these useful methods.

Article source: Unknown
Picture Credit: Pixabay
Tags: #Parenting #DailyTenMinutes #Memory 

When You Have Lot To Cry

True Strength
Is when you have lots to cry
But you Choose to SMILE
Take another step forward.
Tags: #DailyTenMinutes, #Strength 

Discussions are Better Than Arguments

Image result for discussions

DISCUSSIONS are always

Better than ARGUMENTS..


ARGUMENTS are to find out



DISCUSSIONS is to find out



10 Steps To Better Decision Making

 Considering The Possibilities

1. Making a difficult choice can seem harrowing when you feel you're working alone. Involve others in your decision making by asking for criticism and seeking advice from those who can approach the choice from a fresh perspective. Listen to opinions that fall on both sides of the topic at hand. You may also want to consult an expert.

2. Learn from your mistakes as well as your triumphs. Examine decisions you have made in the past as they will teach you more than you will learn from most other sources. Though some decisions will not seem important, all decisions shape our lives and should be regarded as educational. Apply that knowledge to your current dilemma.

3. A good decision acted upon in a timely matter is always better than a great one acted upon too late. It is important to recognize that you will never know enough to make the perfect decision. Don't become paralyzed by your need to foresee all possible outcomes to every possible choice.

4. Involve your head and your heart. Ask both practical questions and personal questions about the problem at hand. Considering the facts as well as your feelings (and the feelings of others) when examining your options will ensure that you make a balanced decision.

5. Before anything else, focus on the most basic, necessary results. Often, a decision maker will get bogged down thinking about the non-essential elements of a decision. Avoid considering extraneous factors and far-fetched perfect outcomes. Ask yourself, "What needs to be done?"

6. Consider the entire range of possibilities, no matter how unlikely. When faced with a complex decision, brainstorm by yourself or with others to find as many of the vital elements as possible. Evaluate those elements as they relate to the choice you must make.

7. It was a wise person who noted that, "you can't please all of the people all of the time." Almost all decisions will involve some dissatisfaction or conflict. Some decisions may even create new problems. Once you have made a decision, stand by it. Keep in mind that you have used your best judgment and it was the best choice at the time.

8. Don't waste time on poor choices. Reject poor choices, even if you've begun to implement them, and stop doing the things that aren't working, so you can focus on the solutions that have strong potential.

9. Consult with the people who will be directly affected by your decision. People appreciate being heard and enjoy when their opinions are seen as valuable. Even making a simple choice can have a profound impact on those around you.

10. It is easy to dismiss your intuition, but in doing so, you may be disregarding valuable insight and even solutions. Ask yourself what choices you would make if you weren't afraid and then see what your subconscious offers as an answer. Try to ignore the fear of error when consulting your "gut."

Source: Unknown
Picture Source: Pixabay
Tags: #DailyTenMinutes #DecisonMaking #Choices

Story: George, Cop and Young Man

George got up and poured a cup of coffee.
The front door of the office flew open. In burst a young man with a gun. "Give me all your cash! Do it now!" the young man yelled. His hand was shaking and George could tell that he had never done anything like this before.
"That's the guy that shot me!" exclaimed the officer.
"Son, why are you doing this?" asked George, "You need to put the cannon away. Somebody else might get hurt." The young man was confused. "Shut up old man, or I'll shoot you, too. Now give me the cash!"
The cop was reaching for his gun. "Put that thing away," George said to the cop, "we got one too many in here now."
He turned his attention to the young man. "Son, it's Christmas Eve. If you need money, well then, here. It ain't much but it's all I got. Now put that pea shooter away."
George pulled $150 out of his pocket and handed it to the young man, reaching for the barrel of the gun at the same time. The young man released his grip on the gun, fell to his knees and began to cry. "I'm not very good at this am I? All I wanted was to buy something for my wife and son," he went on. "I've lost my job, my rent is due, my car got repossessed last week."
George handed the gun to the cop. "Son, we all get in a bit of squeeze now and then. The road gets hard sometimes, but we make it through the best we can."
He got the young man to his feet, and sat him down on a chair across from the cop. "Sometimes we do stupid things." George handed the young man a cup of coffee. "Bein' stupid is one of the things that makes us human. Comin' in here with a gun ain't the answer. Now sit there and get warm and we'll sort this thing out."
The young man had stopped crying. He looked over to the cop. "Sorry I shot you. It just went off. I'm sorry officer." "Shut up and drink your coffee” the cop said. George could hear the sounds of sirens outside. A police car and an ambulance skidded to a halt. Two cops came through the door, guns drawn. "Chuck! You ok?" one of the cops asked the wounded officer. “Not bad for a guy who took a bullet. How did you find me?"
"GPS locator in the car. Best thing since sliced bread. Who did this?" the other cop asked as he approached the young man.
Chuck answered him, "I don't know. The guy ran off into the dark. Just dropped his gun and ran."
George and the young man both looked puzzled at each other.
"That guy work here?" the wounded cop continued. "Yep," George said, "just hired him this morning. Boy lost his job."
 The paramedics came in and loaded Chuck onto the stretcher. The young man leaned over the wounded cop and whispered, "Why?" Chuck just said, "Greetings boy ... and you too, George, and thanks for everything."
"Well, looks like you got one doozy of a break there. That ought to solve some of your problems."
George went into the back room and came out with a box. He pulled out a ring box. "Here you go, something for the little woman. I don't think Martha would mind. She said it would come in handy some day."
The young man looked inside to see the biggest diamond ring he ever saw. "I can't take this," said the young man. "It means something to you."
"And now it means something to you," replied George. "I got my memories. That's all I need."
George reached into the box again. An airplane, a car and a truck appeared next. They were toys that the oil company had left for him to sell. "Here's something for that little man of yours."
The young man began to cry again as he handed back the $150 that the old man had handed him earlier.
"And what are you supposed to buy Christmas dinner with? You keep that too," George said. "Now get home to your family."
The young man turned with tears streaming down his face. "I'll be here in the morning for work, if that job offer is still good."
"Nope. I'm closed Christmas day," George said. "See ya the day after."
George turned around to find that the stranger had returned. "Where'd you come from? I thought you left?"
"I have been here. I have always been here," said the stranger. "You say you don't celebrate Christmas. Why?"
"Well, after my wife passed away, I just couldn't see what all the bother was. Puttin' up a tree and all seemed a waste of a good pine tree. Bakin' cookies like I used to with Martha just wasn't the same by myself and besides I was gettin' a little chubby."
The stranger put his hand on George's shoulder. "But you do celebrate the holiday, George. You gave me food and drink and warmed me when I was cold and hungry. The woman with child will bear a son and he will become a great doctor.
The policeman you helped will go on to save 19 people from being killed by terrorists. The young man who tried to rob you will make you a rich man and not take any for himself. "That is the spirit of the season and you keep it as good as any man."
George was taken aback by all this stranger had said. "And how do you know all this?" asked the old man.
"Trust me, George. I have the inside track on this sort of thing. And when your days are done you will be with Martha again."
The stranger moved toward the door. "If you will excuse me, George, I have to go now. I have to go home where there is a big celebration planned."
George watched as the old leather jacket and the torn pants that the stranger was wearing turned into a white robe. A golden light began to fill the room.
 "You see, George ... it's My birthday."
George fell to his knees and replied, "Happy Birthday Jesus."
Tags: #Impact, #DailyTenMinutes
Picture Credit: Pixabay
Story Source: Unknown

7 Rules for Becoming Slim & Smart

The 7 Laws of Leanness

Why do some people seem naturally thin—able to torch cheeseburgers instantly and never gain a pound? And why do some of us—okay, most of us—sweat and diet and sweat and diet some more, and never lose enough to get the body we want?

Because those "naturally thinking people actually live by a series of laws that keep them from ever gaining weight. And if you know their secrets, you can indulge and enjoy and never gain another pound as long as you live.

As the editor-in-chief of Men's Health, I've spent the past two decades interviewing leading experts, poring over groundbreaking studies, and grilling top athletes, trainers, and celebrities for their health and fitness advice. And I've learned that what separates the fit from the fat, the slim from the sloppy, the toned from the torpid, is a set of rules. And what's amazing is that none of them involves spending hours on a treadmill, eating nothing but grapefruit and tree bark, or having part of the small intestine replaced with fiberfill. Follow these simple rules and weight loss will be automatic.

LAW #1: Lean People Don't Diet
What? Of course lean people diet! They're just magically better at denying themselves than the rest of us are, right?
No. In reality, studies show that the number one predictor of future weight gain is being on a diet right now. Part of the reason is that restricting calories reduces strength, bone density, and muscle mass—and muscle is your body's number-one calorie burner. So by dieting, you're actually setting yourself up to gain more weight than ever. And a recent study in the journal Psychosomatic Medicine showed that tracking your diet in a food journal can actually boost your stress levels, which in turn increases your level of a hormone called cortisol, and cortisol is linked to—you guessed it—weight gain.

FAT-FIGHTING FIBER: Get 25 grams of fiber a day—the amount in about 3 servings of fruits and vegetables—and you can boost fat burn up to 30 percent. For more tips on fighting fat and toning your midsection.

LAW #2: Lean People Don't Go Fat-Free: 

Fat doesn't make you fat, period. Indeed, you need fat in your diet to help you process certain nutrients, like vitamins A, D, and E, for example. And many "fat-free�€� foods are loaded with sugar, and therefore have even more calories than their full-fat cousins. Even the American Heart Association says that fat-free labels lead to higher consumption of unhealthy sweets. Fat keeps you full and satisfied. Fat-free will send you running back to the fridge in an hour, hungry for more.

LAW #3: Lean People Sit Down longer to Eat
In fact, the more you sit down and enjoy your food, the leaner you're going to be. Punishing yourself only makes you fat!

Greek researchers recently reported that eating more slowly and savoring your meal can boost levels of two hormones that make you feel fuller. And researchers at Cornell University found that when people sat down at the table with already full plates of food, they consumed up to 35 percent less than they did when eating family-style—that is, by passing serving dishes around the table.

FIX IT WITH FOOD! Check out our list of the foods that, even in moderation, can strengthen your heart, fortify your bones, and boost your metabolism so you can lose weight more quickly.

LAW #4: Lean People Know What They're Going to Eat Next

Planning your responses to hunger may help you shed pounds faster, say Dutch researchers. They posed their subjects questions like "If you're hungry at 4 p.m., then . . . what?�€� Those who had an answer ("I'll snack on some almonds�€�) were more successful at losing weight than those who didn't have an answer.

One of the best things about the brand-new Eat This, Not That! 2012 is that it helps you find fat-fighting food no matter where you are: movie theater, coffee shop, vending machine. It also includes this list of foods that should never see the inside of your belly: 

LAW #5: Lean People Eat Protein In a recent European study, people who ate moderately high levels of protein were twice as likely to lose weight and keep it off as those who didn't eat much protein.

A New England Journal of Medicine study looked at a variety of eating plans and discovered that eating a diet high in protein and low in refined starches (like white bread) was the most effective for weight loss. Protein works on two levels: First, you burn more calories to digest it. Second, because your body has to work harder to digest a Big Mac than, say, a Ho Ho, you stay fuller longer.

LAW #6: Lean People Move Around
I don't mean climbing Kilimanjaro, breaking the tape at the Boston Marathon, or spending 24 hours at 24 Hour Fitness. I mean going for a short bike ride (20 minutes burns 200 calories), taking a leisurely walk (145 calories every 51 minutes), wrestling with your kids (another 100 calories smoked in 22 minutes), or fishing (there's 150 calories gone in an hour—even more if you actually catch something).
Simply put, fit people stay fit by having fun. Scientists have a name for how you burn calories just enjoying yourself. It's called NEAT: non-exercise activity thermogenesis. Sounds complicated, like something only policy wonks at a global warming summit are qualified to discuss. But it's pretty simple: Pick a few activities that you enjoy, from tossing a stick for your dog to bowling with your best friend, and just do them more often. The average person makes 200 decisions every day that affect his or her weight. If you choose the fun option more often than not, you'll see results.

LAW #7: Lean People Watch Less TV

Instead of calling it the boob tube, maybe we should call it the man-boob tube. About 18 percent of people who watch less than two hours of TV a day have a body mass index (BMI) of 30 or more—the cutoff line for obesity, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. But of those who watch more than four hours of TV a day, nearly 30 percent have a BMI that high, according to a study in the Journal of the American College of Cardiology.

Look, I like TV. But all things in moderation: In a study at the University of Vermont, overweight participants who cut their daily TV time in half (from an average of 5 hours to 2.5 hours) burned an extra 119 calories a day. And a recent study of people who successfully lost weight found that 63 percent of them watched less than 10 hours of TV a week. Want more? A study in the journal Annals of Behavioral Medicine reported that lean people have an average of 2.6 television sets in their homes. Overweight people have an average of 3.4. Finally, researchers in Australia recently discovered that every hour in front of the television trims 22 minutes from your life. Yikes!

Breaking any of these seven laws occasionally is fine. Just don't make a habit of it.
source: unknown
Tags #DailyTenMinutes #Health #Slim #Active

Easy Ways To Relieve Stress!

Relaxing is something everybody deserves, and it takes less time than you realize. You don’t have to go on vacation or to a spa to feel calm. There are simple practices that offer relief, with a method for everyone’s tastes and beliefs. Practicing a few of these techniques every day can help reduce the level of stress in your life.
1. Meditate
There’s not much skill required for meditating and it’s an instant way to ease anxiety. Daily practice has been shown to alter your brain’s neural pathways, which can make you more resilient to stress. Sit up straight and close your eyes. Focus on reciting a mantra to yourself, such as ‘I feel at peace’, and sync the mantra with your breathing. If a thought enters your mind, let it float away.

2. Breathe deeply
This technique works very similarly to meditation. This practice slows the heart rate and lowers blood pressure, countering the effects of stress. Sit up straight and close your eyes. Inhale through your nose slowly. Pay attention to how your breath begins in the abdomen, working its way to the top of your head. Reverse this process while exhaling from your mouth.

3. Be present
By slowing down and focusing on the time spent in the moment, you can relieve tension. This is done by focusing on your senses. Take five minutes to focus on a single thing. This can be the taste of the food you’re eating or the feeling of your feet hitting the ground when you’re walking.

4. Talk to friends
A great way to lessen the effects of stress is not to bear it by yourself. Reach out to your friends. Talking with others, whether face to face or over the phone, can offer you the opportunity to share your concerns and feelings. It also provides you with a different perspective and strengthens your bond with others.

5. Listen to your body
Sometimes you don’t realize where stress and physical tension is resting in your body. A mental scan of your body can help you understand how stress affects your joints, muscles and bones on a daily basis. Sit still or lie back on a bed, starting from your toes, working upwards, simply being aware of what feels loose, and what feels tight.

6. Practicing gratitude

Being grateful can help cancel out worries and negative thoughts. The best way to keep a positive perspective is by keeping a gratitude journal. This can help you remember all the good things that you have in your life, such as your accomplishments, loved ones, passions and skills. When you start feeling stressed, take a moment to look over your notes. This will remind you what really matters, and not to be a "Negative Nancy".

7. Decompress, with a DIY massage
Treat your neck and shoulders to some relief with a warm heat wrap, for 10 minutes, wearing it close to your eyes, relaxing your face, neck, upper chest and back muscles. Next, take a foam roller or a hand-sized ball to massage away the tension. Place the ball between your back and the wall. Leaning against the ball, apply gentle pressure for 15 seconds, then move the ball to other tense areas.

8. Giggle, chuckle, laugh
Laughing has a chemical effect on your mood because it lowers cortisol, the body’s stress hormone, and releases endorphins, which are chemicals produced by your brain that elevate your mood. There are many ways to tickle your funny bone. Read jokes or comics, watch a funny video, or chat with a funny friend.

9. Get moving
Exercise is another way to release feel-good brain chemicals. You don’t have to engage in extreme sports. Mild exercise such as walking and yoga has been shown to ease depression and anxiety. Start with something easy, like a walk around the block, choosing the stairs or even some stretching.

Why Women Are More Emotionally Sensitive!

When it comes to the way they experience emotions, there appears to be a divide between men and women. Men are stereotypically seen as rational, level-headed thinkers, while women are often viewed as being more emotional. But are these assumptions entirely unfounded? Perhaps not completely.

A recent study, conducted by researchers at the University of Montreal and the Institut Universitaire en Santé Mentale de Montréal, has found that certain differences in brain functioning affect the way in which men and women respond to negative imagery.

The researchers drew their inspiration from the differences they observed in mental illness between the sexes. “Not everyone’s equal when it comes to mental illness,” said Adrianna Mendrek, one of the researchers. "Greater emotional reactivity in women may explain many things, such as their being twice as likely to suffer from depression and anxiety disorders to men.”

Earlier studies have also given credence to the theory that women and men react to emotional stimuli in different ways. Mendrek and her co-researchers had previously found that the limbic system (the brain's emotion and memory center) reacted differently for men and women, when participants were shown negative images. They decided to go a step further for this study, as they now chose to research whether hormonal levels affect this psychological processing, too.

There were 46 participants who took part in the study (25 female and 21 male), and the researchers ruled out potential contributing factors such as age, education, ethnicity, marital status, and socioeconomic status. Every volunteer was given a blood test at the start to assess their levels of testosterone and estrogen in order to see in what way they affected the results. They were then exposed to images that evoked positive, negative, or neutral emotions, while they underwent fMRI brain scans. Participants also had to review their emotional responses when looking at each image.

Overall, men seemed far less reactive to the emotional images than their female counterparts. Higher estrogen levels seemed to indicate increased sensitivity to the images, while higher testosterone levels appeared to make the subjects more desensitized.

When assessing the brain's reaction to the images, they discovered that the dorsomedial prefrontal cortex (dmPFC) and amygdala on the brain's right hemisphere were activated for both men and women. However, the connection between these two components was discovered to be more powerful in men, leading to the additional interaction between these two parts, and thus further decreased sensitivity to the stimuli.
The researchers explained that the reactions of the dmPFC and amygdala can tell us loads about how people process their emotions. The dmPFC is the part of the brain that helps process social interactions and mediates reasoning, emotions, and perception. The amygdala, on the other hand, is the part that is used to detect threats, and is often triggered when somebody experiences sadness or fear.

“A stronger connection between these areas in men suggests they have a more analytical than emotional approach when dealing with negative emotions,” said Stéphane Potvin, associate professor at the University of Montreal’s Department of Psychiatry. “It is possible that women tend to focus more on the feelings generated by these stimuli, when men remain somewhat ‘passive’ toward negative emotions, trying to analyze the stimuli and their impact.”

Mendrek's team believes that their study shows just how the male and female brains seem to function differently at a psychological level. “There are both biological and cultural factors that modulate our sensitivity to negative situations in terms of emotions,” Mendrek said. She concluded that the next step forward is to research exactly how hormones affect people's reactions to various types of emotions, such as sadness, fear, or anger.

Today's Inspiration - Don't Worry About Pains

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Don’t worry about your  
Just remember,
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13 Conflict Management Tips!

13 Conflict Management Tips!
by Lee Jay Berman

Conflict happens. It is inevitable. It is going to happen whenever you have people with different expectations. This makes conflict management critical, whether avoiding arguments, disputes, lasting conflict or ultimately, litigation. Conflict can be avoided if steps are taken early in a discussion to diffuse anger and facilitate communication, and it can be resolved by applying a series of thoughtfully applied steps. As a full-time mediator and trainer in the fields of negotiation and conflict resolution, I see conflict in its final stages - full blown litigation or on the verge of it in pre-litigation mode. What I have learned in seeing these disputes for 10 years is that most of them could have been resolved in the earliest stages if the people involved applied some of the skills that mediators use to resolve conflict.. And wouldn't it be great if companies could resolve these disputes before each side spent hundreds of thousands in litigation costs, before the employee was terminated or before the customer or working relationship was gone forever? Here are some tools for avoiding and resolving disputes in the early stages, before they become full-blown conflicts:
1. Stay Calm.
Thomas Jefferson said, "Nothing gives one so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances." The thing that leads to conflict is escalation. What starts people escalating is their anger. Most of us stop listening to understand as we get angry. Instead, we start listening in order to argue back. Remaining calm is essential for performing these tools. To remain calm, it helps to look at the big picture. If you think about it, most every dispute gets resolved eventually. So when conflict inevitably happens, it is helpful to stop and think that, chances are, it is going to be resolved eventually. As such, why not begin problem solving now? Finally, it is a fact that in our busy lives with rush hour traffic, cell phones, PDAs, overfilled e-mail boxes, too many clients and not enough support, that we are all a little more stressed than we would like to be. When a conflict arises, one of the most beneficial things you can do is to ask yourself, "What might I be bringing to the dispute?" We can usually look at another person and figure that maybe he/she had a conflict at home or that he/she has been under tremendous pressure. However, we are not usually self-aware enough to ask ourselves what we might have going on. It is important in avoiding later embarrassment by checking in with our own personal boiling point before responding.

2. Listen to Understand.
Now, picture a dispute in which you were recently involved. Maybe it was this morning leaving the house, with a co-worker or client or even with a family member. As you replay that experience, ask yourself how much listening was going on. My bet is that any listening was only being done to formulate an argument back to prove your point. When most of us get into a dispute, the first thing we do is stop listening. The only way to settle a dispute or solve any kind of a problem is to listen carefully to what the other person is saying. Perhaps they will surprise you with reason, or their point is actually true. In the mediations that I do, I often learn what people's underlying interests are by letting them go on and on telling their perspective of an issue until they give me the one thing that is standing in the way of them resolving it. They may start out by degrading the product and personalizing it by saying those of us who delivered it are all incompetent, but I find that this is little more than their anger speaking. What they really want is their product fixed, not to insult us personally.

Psychologists tell us that anger is a secondary emotion and that it is usually triggered as a defense mechanism to cover up hurt or fear. When someone is angry, there is usually some hurt or fear that he/she is embarrassed about, or perhaps even unaware of because the anger is so all consuming. In order to diffuse people's anger, you must listen to them. Hear them out. Let them go until they have run out of gas. Let them vent as long as they can until they begin to calm down. You then will see a person start to slow down some, and begin to feel safe enough to finally tell you that what frustrated him or her so much was that the salesperson never returned any phone calls, and/or the customer service person kept trying to place blame elsewhere, rather than taking responsibility and apologizing for the product being unacceptable.
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The best thing you can do to get people to the point where they are willing to show some vulnerability and trust you with some of the real reasons why they are upset is to engage in "Active Listening." Active listening means giving them active physical and verbal signs that you are with them and understand what they are saying. Simple things like nodding and saying, "Uh huh" or "OK, go on" can make the speaker feel as if his/her story is welcomed by you and that you want to continue. On the phone, people hear dead silence and cannot read your reaction to their complaints and thoughts. Given that we all sometimes fear the worst, people tend to shut down and stop feeling it is safe to continue telling their story..
My friend and colleague Jim Melamed, a divorce mediator and trainer based in Eugene, Ore., said: "You cannot effectively move toward conflict resolution until each participant experiences him/herself to be fully heard with regard to their perspective - what they want and why." That means, if someone says that the product he/she bought from you is unacceptable, and they are interrupted and asked what would be acceptable before they have finished telling all about the problem, that person gets the message that all you want to do is fix the problem. The impression is that you do not care about them or the problem you had with your product, and that can feel a little like being swept under the carpet. A good customer service person in a situation like this would let the client finish before asking if there were any other problems. This may seem counter-intuitive because it might bring on even more of the same, but this is what you want. People build trust as they are listened to. If they had another problem with the delivery timing or any other facet of the transaction, this is when you need to hear it - at the outset, not later once you feel as if you have met all of their original concerns. The only way to solve a problem is to get all of the broken pieces on the table at once before you begin trying to "glue it back together."

The most useful phrases in this part of the process (what mediators call the "Opening Statement") are questions such as, "Can I ask you - what about that bothered you so much?" or "What about that was so important to you?" These invite people to go deeper into the problem and tell you what the "real" problem is. Usually, this is where you hear that their boss is upset and they are afraid for their job or some underlying concern. This is a problem that might be handled with something as simple as a letter of apology, from you, the salesman or the president of your company, addressed to them with a copy to their boss, taking full responsibility and apologizing for the problem. Then, you will have a customer you might be able to keep.
3. Accentuate the Positive.

It is important to find some commonalities, or create them, between you and the person on the other end. It is helpful and empathetic to say, "Oh boy, I know what you are going through. I've had a similar situation just recently. Let me see what I can do about this." This serves to normalize the situation.. It tells someone that he/she is not the only one who has gone through this and that his or her reaction to it is normal. That calms people right away.

4. State Your Case Tactfully.

The key here is to help people understand your perspective on things without making them defensive. To the extent you can disarm them, they will be more able to hear what you are really saying. A couple of tips are to own what is yours - apologize for what you or your team did wrong and do it first. This enables them to hear what you have to say next. Also, try not to state issues of difference as fact. Leave a little benefit of the doubt. Rather than insisting something arrived on schedule, it is better to acknowledge any room for doubt by acknowledging, "My information shows them arriving on schedule. I'll have to take a closer look into this." While you may still be right, clearly you have to gather more information to convince them of that, and if you are not right, then you do not have to apologize for misstating things. It also is helpful to state your position along with your interests. What that means is that instead of maintaining that there is nothing wrong with your product, which is purely argumentative and does not offer any support for your position, it is better to offer something helpful, such as providing another perspective by sending someone over to inspect the product in person. That way, the customer can show and describe exactly why the product is not working as necessary. Your position is the bottom line of what you are willing to do. Your interests are the reasons behind that decision. For example, it might be your position that you cannot take any product back or rescind the contract. However, your reason for that - your interest - may be that your bonus is tied directly to your returns, and that you have every incentive in the world to solve this problem another way. You may also offer what some of those things are, so that you are not just taking away something from them or denying their request, but offering positive alternatives in its place.

One way to do this is to use "I Messages." An "I" message sounds like, "When you didn't come home last night, your father and I got really worried. What we would like you to do next time is call if you're going to be late, so that we know you're OK because we love you and care about you." That is how most of our parents were when we were teenagers, right? Seriously, can you imagine how we would have reacted if they had put it this way instead of the scenario we remember of being grounded for life while stomping off to bed? "I" messages are important because they describe the experience through the speaker's eyes, rather than simply the position (in this case the punishment). That disarms the person you are speaking to, and it takes the fight out of their next statement back to you.

5. Attack the Problem, Not the Person.

Your points will be heard more clearly if you can depersonalize your comments and point only at the issue. Rather than accusing people of "always messing things up," it is better to say, "We'll have to take a closer look at why this keeps happening." In most statements that we make in a dispute, we are fighting with our own anger and are tempted to put a zinger into the point we are trying to get across. You will be heard better and improve your chances of resolving the issue the way you want if you can catch yourself and take the zinger out. Obviously, this is easier with e-mail and requires great concentration when in a face-to-face disagreement.

6. Avoid the Blame Game.

Assigning blame is only helpful in one instance in problem solving - if you assign it to yourself. Generally speaking, figuring out whose fault something is does not do any good if the goal is to fix a problem. It is a diversion and sometimes a costly one because if a person feels blamed, he/she often checks out of a conversation. The trick to resolving clashes is to focus on problem solving, rather than pointing fingers. Focus on what you and the others can do to solve a problem and make it better, and it will be behind you before you know it.

7. Focus on the Future, Not the Past.

In the past tense, we have the purchase order, the contract, the agreement and the deal as it was understood by all involved. The present and future tenses are where the solution ends. Rather than focusing on what went wrong or who should have done what, the secret to dispute resolution is to treat it like problem solving and focus on what can be done to resolve the problem. Once that is done, companies can look to the past tense to analyze what went wrong and how to improve quality control and efficiency. However, when there is a problem that has an angry customer or a disgruntled employee, the solution is all that anyone is interested in.

8. Ask the Right Kind of Questions.

Questions such as "Why is that?" or "What did you think it would be?" make a person who you are talking to defensive. They inherently question the person's judgment or opinion, as well as coming off as curt. More often that not, people ask these short, direct questions, the type that can sound like a police officer's interrogation or a lawyer's cross-examination. These questions are designed to get just what you want from someone, rather than to permit them to tell you what they want you to know about something. If you want someone to answer you with real information, rather than just arguing back, it is best to give them a little information first. For example, "Since I don't have a copy of the P.O.. in front of me, it would help me to investigate this if you could tell me more about how the colors on your order are described." Telling them why you are asking, puts your intent first, so they don't have to guess it. This questioning style tells a person that you are trying to do your job and to figure out some facts to get to reach a solution. By delivering your request in a poised and attentive tone, , it makes the person you are asking less defensive and gets you more of what you want. The other type of question that is especially helpful when you are trying to gather information is an open-ended question. These are the opposite of directive questions, and they invite the other person to tell you what he or she thinks is important about the situation. "Can you tell me what happened from the beginning?" or "Sounds as if this was really frustrating for you" can give you information that you might later use to problem solve.

9. Pick Your Battles.

It is also important when asking questions to remember to Pick Your Battles. Human nature makes us want to be right, even to the point of being defensive or arguing points that do not matter in the big picture. It is even fair game to ask the other person, "On a scale of one-to-10, how important is this issue to you?" If an issue is a five to you and a nine to the person you are talking to, it is best to give that point up and use the same scale when an item is really important to you. After all, business relations are, like my brother's future father-in-law once told him about marriage, a "60-60 proposition." Most people think it is supposed to be 50-50, but the truth is, when adjusted for each person's perspective on how much they givevs. how much they receive, it really is a 60-60 proposition. Another marital proposition is also helpful here, do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy?

10. Link Offers.

Car salesmen do this all the time. They ask you what you want your monthly payment to be and then set the price of the car and the interest rate on the loan or lease so that they can match your monthly payment. Essentially, it's a way of saying, "I can either do this or that, which would be better for you?" It really is just sales skills - giving people the choice between two positives, so that they feel as if you are trying to help.

11. Be Creative.

Brainstorm. Remember that everything is negotiable. Feel free to think outside of the box in order to expand the pie. Make it so that no idea is too far fetched. Being creative with resolutions takes longer, but can yield a true win-win solution. The best solution to a dispute is to get more business out of it.. As such, one common problem-solving technique is to propose that instead of a cash refund, giving clients a deep discount on future orders in order to show what a good job you are capable of doing for them. Many of the lawsuits I settle come away with win-win solutions, where instead of just compromising, we actually collaborate to reach a solution that benefits everyone. This requires listening when asking the open-ended questions and gathering morsels of good information that you will later use to formulate proposals that meet their interests. For example, you might learn about particulars that affected an order. From here, you can propose creative solutions that replace things such as broken items, or instead of using the money to re-do the entire order, you can use less money to ship a few dozen shirts with their logo on them so that your counterpart can look like a hero in front of the boss. These kinds of fixes make clients look good and keep them loyal to you, even after an initial dispute.

12. Be Confident.

You can do this! Many people are afraid of confrontation and shy away from it. I have taught everyone, from housewives and high school grads to named senior partners in law firms and CEOs, how to do these simple steps. The process works.. All you have to do is follow the steps.

Furthermore, you must do this. Now that you have these tools, it is imperative that you do something about it. You owe it to your customers and your co-workers.

13. Celebrate Agreement!

This kind of negotiation is a hard process. It requires two people to remain in an uncomfortable, potentially confrontational position for a long time to rebuild trust and be creative while trying to figure out the best, rather than the fastest, solution. Once it is accomplished, both you and the person you are talking to deserve a good pat on the back. There is nothing wrong with going to lunch or dinner to celebrate the resolution of a dispute that could have been destructive, but that ended with a win-win solution where everyone was satisfied. This is an important process for avoiding more serious disputes such as lawsuits and losing hard-earned customers. Congratulate yourself and your partner in this solution. After all, nothing is more important than your company and its survival. Nothing is better for your company's survival than learning to make peace and resolve the inevitable disputes that will arise. Learn to cultivate peace with customers, suppliers, employees, labor and management.

Utilizing these tools takes patience and generally requires changing old behaviors. However, if people on the front lines, in human resources, customer service and client relations, use simple tools such as these, they would resolve most disputes at that level, keeping them out of the legal department and out of the mediator's office.
Lee Jay Berman is a mediator based in Los Angeles. He founded the American Institute of Mediation in 2009, after serving as Director of Pepperdine's flagship Mediating the Litigated Case program from 2002-2009.

#conflict #DailyTenMinutes #relationship