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Reasons for Negative Thoughts & Stress --- How to Avoid Them

By Junaid Tahir I have learnt in my 33 years of life that human mind tends to think negative more than positive. There are several con...

By Junaid Tahir

I have learnt in my 33 years of life that human mind tends to think negative more than positive.
There are several contributing factors for negative thinking such as bad professional or personal circumstance, financial issues , health problems or relationship issues. This article helps you prepare on how to respond in some of the most common stress contributing situations:

Personal Circumstances: Remember that fact that life is what 20% happens to you and 80% how you react to it. Its only your own thinking; reactions responsible for our peace of mind. Regardless of the nature or complexity of life situations, there is always a way out. My personal recommendation to fix life's big issues is to break them into several small issues and start fixing one by one; one at a time. Remember that keep thinking negative on issues will keep increasing the weight of the problems. It's just like holding the glass of water for one minute compared to holding it for one hour compared to holding it for whole day. Off course the more time you hold it for, the more strain it will cause to your muscles and vice versa. This is exactly how your negative thoughts disturbs your brain and takes away your peace of mind.

Misunderstanding: "I am responsible for what I said but not responsible for what you understood". In principle, i agree to this but this is not how life works. Clear communication involves understanding the emotional aspect of your listener and then chose the most effective words to say what you want to say. Your job while speaking is to make sure that you elaborate your point very well by using right words and proper details. When listening make sure you conceive and understand the message correctly. In case of ambiguity, ask again, even again else there is a serious chance that a something incorrect or negative is going to be concluded. Clarity in our day to day communication can definitely wash away the element of misunderstanding. As said by Stephen Covey "Seek first to understand and then to be understood"

Financial Limitations: Life is beautiful, but we complicate it by adding more and more wishes into it. Recommendation is to always try differentiating between Needs and Wants. Try to live in your needs and you won't be sad again. Another recommendation is to think of less-fortunate people quite often instead of always dreaming about rich people. If you want to become rich, start working on it by preparing a concrete plan, however don't allow your plans steal your current peace of mind. Live in the current moment. Don't allow your brain to adopt short cuts which are based on negative strategies. Negative approaches result in negative outcomes; sooner or later. Hence, be positive and adopt positive approaches.

Family Relations: Having healthy family relations is a real blessing. This is something you can find hundreds of books on in the market or on internet but there are many basic tips and techniques through which relationships can be filled with love. A straight forward approach to resolve small conflicts is to 'Convince or Get Convinced'. There shouldn't be anything in between. For the bigger issues, the suggestion is to break the problem in small issues and fix it one by one, as stated earlier. Further, power of patience can help bring massive improvements in your life. Patience also means listening other empathetically and understand other's point of view. This helps conclude right things.

Office Stress: My personal formulae is that for any given situation apply two step formulae:
First filter is to ask yourself whether this issue is really something I should be worried about. If not, just drop and you are done. I have seen man people start poking thier noses for matters which are not really relevant or important. Mind it.
Second filter is to "Park" this problem for sometime in order to concentrate on things which are more important. 'Parking' has some advantages… for example, you are controlling your mind not to think of this particular issue for the time being and hence avoiding negativity and stress. Sometimes the issues are resolved at their own as we move along. However, if any issue really needs to be fixed then develop the power of analyzing the situation to breakdown it smaller issues and see the contributing factors and find out the root cause to fix it.

Overall speaking, no one is in charge of your happiness except you. Control your thoughts because thoughts are the driving force for your actions. Positive thoughts lead to positive actions.

Junaid Tahir, a telecom engineer and a blogger, writes articles on wisdom, happiness and stress management at his personal blog. His personal Google Group can be joined here. He is reachable at for any kind of suggestions and comments.